Historically, marriage counseling was a last resort for those who were close to getting a divorce. That mentality has since changed due to the effectiveness of the process. The range of patients vary from couples who will soon be married, those starting a family, couples trying to manage martial issues to those recovering their marriage.
The most common questions patients ask prior to the process are, “does marriage counseling really help?” and “if we see a counselor, will it save our marriage?” It is healthy to have such questions about the counseling process and important to understand the advantages and disadvantages before starting with a professional. The following details the pros and cons of marriage counseling.
Marriage experts agree that to maintain a healthy relationship, it’s important for couples to have a fresh, non-judgmental and objective perspective with regards to their issues. Although consulting family and friends for advice is helpful, you often receive biased opinions which do not help the issues. This is where marriage counseling is effective. The following are the best benefits for seeing a marriage professional:
Create a Positive Attitude
One of the greatest advantages of marital counseling is the actual concept of asking for assistance. Many couples attempt to work through their issues and go so deep that it is too late to save the marriage. Those seeking a marriage professional typically become more positive when asking for help with their issues.
Critical Communication and Conflict Resolution
The counselor will enlighten you on different relationship tips that can be used throughout your daily routine. The goal of each counseling session is to improve the marriage slightly using these tips. Also, you will be reminded as to how imperative maintaining communication is with improving your marriage. Without communication, the therapy will not be effective.
Discussion of the Primary Issues
During the counseling process, you will be focused on discussing your issues in an organized manner. This will help dig deep into the primary problems and the factors that may have caused them. Since you will be there with your spouse, they will understand your feelings and can help work to correct those factors.
Help See Clear Results
Many couples are skeptical about the idea of marriage counseling at first. However, once engulfed in the process, they see how much each session helps them to realize shortcomings. In addition to tips from a professional, you will also gain a clear picture of your marriage after the counseling process is complete. This excites most couples and motivates them to work harder inside and outside of each session.
Identification of Strengths and Weaknesses
During each counseling session, the counselor will identify and discuss the strengths and weaknesses of your marriage. This will give you both insight as to where the focus needs to be and make you appreciate one another for highlighting the strengths of your marriage.
When your issues are discussed by an expert outsider, you will have a completely different perspective on the situation. Also, you will be more hopeful about your marriage and more determined to work on the issues to improve the situation. Looking from the outside-in often helps couples see the factors and issues in their relationship more clearly.
Receiving Unbiased Advice
One of the primary reasons for visiting a counselor is you will receive an unbiased opinion on your marriage from a trained professional. The counselor provides tips and additional insight to help work through your problems.
The advantages of marriage counseling far outweigh the disadvantages. Although marriage counseling works in most instances, there is no guarantee that it is the solution to all problems. Many couples expect the marriage counselor to be a miracle worker so they leave the counselor to do all the work and do not participate. There is no quick fix for any situation and both parties need to participate for the counseling to be effective.
Sometimes, when couples discuss their problems, past issues are highlighted which could harm the relationship. However, in order to proceed with a healthy relationship, these issues need to be addressed. Unfortunately, sometimes the spouse is not able to get past the issue. On the other hand, some couples need to work-out problems on their own and visiting a professional causes greater confusion for them. It’s true that sometimes marriage counseling is not exactly what a trouble marriage needs.
Marriages are not easy and problems do occur. If you are having issues and it seems like there are no outlets, don’t give up. Seek a marriage counselor that’s the right fit for you and your partner. If you are both really willing to work for the marriage, a counselor could be the answer.